Just for kicks (PUNNNN!!!!!!) I decided to figure out the top 7 foot-smacks doled out in martial arts movie history. These kicks range from the acrobatic to the sheer face crunching. The criteria I used to determine the winners was a combination of style, athleticism, and influence in pop culture.
It was a difficult process as there are many great movies with sweet chin music, but the following stood out to me. Hang around until the end of the article and I’ll give a few runners-up that didn’t quite fit the bill.
Here we go…
7. Billy Jack – Face Whopin’
This iconic kick comes from the Movie “Billy Jack” and is delivered by Tom Laughlin. Laughlin plays an ex-green beret Hapkido do-gooder who runs afoul of the law. Find out what happens next when they back him into the proverbial corner:
6. The Transporter – Bicycle Kicking
When you think of bicycle kicks, you probably envision a skilled soccer player making a diving hit over his own head. This is much different. In the following clip Jason Statham finds a way to put the boots to all of his oiled up opponents:
5. Ong Bak – Knee of Doom
Have you ever heard of a knee technique referred to as a “knee kick”? I hope so, because I am using that as an excuse to include this hit from the movie Ong Bak. After a good minute or two of being taunted by his opponent, Tony Ja prepares something extra spicy once the round starts:
4. Enter the Dragon – Ohara Gets His
Almost every scene in Enter the Dragon is ground breaking and awesome. But there is one kick that actually led to physical injury of the cast and crew. When Bruce Lee finally fights Ohara, he lines him up for an absolutely brutal sidekick. The actor Bob Wall was ok afterwards, but one of the extras in the background broke his hand during the fall. That’s no joke:
3. Karate Kid – The Crane Kick
While it may not be physically impressive, is there any kick more iconic? The crane kick is what every d-bag relies on when they try to mimic or make fun of martial artists. It also inspired a generation of future karateka (yours truly included). It’s over Johhny yea, you did it!!!:
2. Kickboxer – The 360 Split Spinning Hook Heel Foot Kick
Is it possible to build an entire career on one face slapping technique? Yes. JCVD did just that and kicked his way into our hearts. The thing that makes this kick so powerful is that no matter how many times you see it (and no matter how many movies he uses it in), it still rocks. For your pleasure, this montage:
1. Enter the Dragon – Han’s Skull Crusher
I’ve never actually felt the vibrations of a kick through my TV until I saw this armageddon-inducing swat from Bruce Lee. In the final epic fight against Han, Bruce puts the beat knuckle down until Han is in a dazed state. At that point Bruce lines him up and delivers a blow so powerful that my nose is starting to bleed just thinking about it. If you watch carefully it seems obvious that they use a Han-doll as a stunt double, and I don’t blame them. In fact I hope there were no live crew members within a 20 foot radius. Enjoy the number 1 kick ever put on the silver screen:
The martial arts universe is home to a lot of awesome kicks, and here are a few that I thought deserved mention as well. Check out the following links if you want more foot flying action:
Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick – Certainly Chuck Norris’s famous roundhouse kicking meets the pop culture criteria to be a winner. Yet, despite the fanfare and entertaining jokes, I just don’t think there was enough here to trump the kicks on the list. I also discovered that Chuck Norris throws hook kicks far more often than roundhouse kicks, which made it difficult to find good footage of him from a movie (as opposed to Texas Ranger). I also had a tough time siphoning out all of the spoof and joke videos in order to try to find Chuck actually in action. You’ll notice the video in the link is a spinning hook from Return of the Dragon. Best I could do.
Captain Kirk Dropkick – Seriously famous, but from a TV show so I couldn’t include it.
Drunken Master Kick Fight – There is a fight of massive kicking in the Jackie Chan film “The Legend of Drunken Master”. Unfortunately no one kick stood out so I ultimately decided against it.
Wayne’s World II Flying Kick – The fight between Wayne and Cassandra’s dad is awesome, and everytime I see the dad pull off the flying kick I laugh out loud.
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This one’s wide open – any kicks that stand out in your memory?
Martial arts can bring out the best in us. But then, there’s that other part. The embarrassing part. When things go horribly awry.
Check out the following videos and images to learn why you should feel good about yourself. Consider this your day’s confidence booster.
Bad Idea #1 – Mini Makouts With Your Opponent
I understand having respect for your opponent, but this is a little too much. Watch what happens when one unfortunate competitor gets it in his head to kiss his challenger:
Why would you do that!? If he was trying to play head games, it backfired.
Bad Idea #2 – These Pants
Think that the old-school karate gi is a bit stodgy and dated? Check out the alternative from a decade ago:
Yes, why be traditional? You too could look like an asshole. Just kidding Joey. I wonder if he still wears these out?
Bad Idea #3 – Persistence
I always say it’s a good thing to have that never-give-up attitude, but sometimes you gotta knock it off. Like this guy:
Stop it. No really. Stop it. Also, that huge guy holding your boards is not the problem.
Bad Idea #4 – Martial Arts Demonstrations With Fire
Breaking 20,30,500 bricks is awesome enough – can we skip the fire? I guess not:
I wouldn’t want to fight him unless I had some flaming bricks lying around.
Bad Idea #5 – Martial Arts Demonstrations with a Live Blade
Just because you have the ability to obtain a sword doesn’t mean you should use it. Ever. For example:
Not only did he almost kill that guy, but his swings were ridiculous! At least show some decent technique. 9th Dan ehh – right.
Let us all make a communal bow to these brave souls who have showed us how not to do things. Let us avoid their mistakes and never wear those awful pants.
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Seasons greetings. We are a scant few days away from Christmas, and that means it’s time to get those last minute wishes into the folks in charge. As martial artists, we have only one mythological character to be concerned about – Martial Arts Santa.
Unlike his cousin Regular Santa, Martial Arts Santa isn’t concerned about your religious denomination. Instead he’s been watching your sidekicks and checking his list to see when your last promotion was.
Now, during this most joyous of seasons, I ask MASanta to grant me some holiday wishes.
Wish #1: Make the New Karate Kid Disappear
I’m sure many of you are aware, but there is a new Karate Kid in the works. If MASanta has the ability to visit every house in the world in a single night, certainly he can make one upcoming movie disappear.
One of the goals of the holidays is to promote peace on Earth, right? Well what better way than to avoid the rage and angst of martial artists all over the planet that grew up with the original Karate Kid series? This one seems like a no brainer.
Wish #2: Bring Bruce Lee and Musashi Back to Life and Make Them Fight
Man, what an epic showdown that would be! They’d be kinda like zombies, so we could pit them against each other in a variety of ways.
First, I’d have them go at it open-hand. No tricks. No weapons.
Second, I’d let them pick a weapon of choice. I imagine Bruce Lee would use the nunchaku while Musashi would use a katana.
Third, I would toss them both Lirpa and let things go down just like this:
Wish #3: Settle Once and For All Those Mandatory Martial Arts Questions
Every martial arts blog and forum seems to inevitably run into the same couple of questions. Things like:
1. What’s the best style?
2. Does chi exist?
3. Do no-touch knockouts exist?
4. How many fights end on the ground?
5. Is MMA a real martial art?
6. etc. etc.
My request to MASanta would be to make a list and just answer these questions definitively. If anybody questions him, MASanta would then have the authority to use his secret holiday-figurehead style to wipe out the offending parties.
I’ve never pondered what it would be like getting stabbed by a sharpened candy cane…and I don’t think I want to find out any time soon.
Wish #4: Bring me an official Red Ryder carbine-action 200-shot range model air rifle (BB Gun)
with a compass in the stock, and this thing which tells time.
Wish #5: Grant Me Ten More Wishes
What? MASanta isn’t a genie? FINE. Then I guess i’ll wish for a quick recovery for all of our martial arts brethren who are currently dealing with injury. Also, continued success to all of my readers who have been generous enough to stop by from time to time!
So what’s your wish? Get it into MASanta before it’s too late!