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The Best Samurai Fails on the Net

July 7, 2009 | Author: Matthew | Filed under: Martial Arts,Quizzes and Games,Sword,TV Shows

As a sword practitioner, I feel it is my duty to bring you the epic samurai failings of the internet. If you’re looking for good, quality content – today is not your day. But, if you enjoy watching cringe-worthy videos about swords, you’ve come to the right place.

This first video comes courtesy of failblog.org. In many sword arts, there is a concept called tameshigiri. Tameshigiri is the process of practice cutting through rolled up tatami mats or other artificial substitutes for the human body. In most instances, things go well and the viewing audience is impressed. Unfortunately this is not like most times…

You gotta believe that sword is razor sharp, which makes this all the more “holy crap!” worthy. I’m assuming everyone is ok as it didn’t seem to stick into anything (here’s hoping).

The next video is a lesson in getting what you pay for. If you’ve ever watched Home Shopping Network, you know that they sometimes come out with crazy deals like 600 knives for $79.95. They also sell curiously cheap katanas for right around the $40 mark. Why so cheap?

Ahhh. The only person truly shocked is the guy who got poked. This is also why live TV is so great – you never really know what’s going to happen. If you have one of these swords in your home (I do), make sure never to use it or even touch it.

The final video I think I showed once before, but it bares repeating for this particular post topic. A “master 9th dan” gets it into his head that he wants to do some cutting demos at a tournament. What his assistant doesn’t know is that the master needed a little more practice…

You gotta hand it to them for keeping composure though. It’s almost like accidents have happened before to these guys…

You may think that this post is purely for sick amusement, but you’d be wrong! In fact I am trying to communicate a very important message of not toying around with weapons, especially katanas. You kids out there – if you are thinking about running around, cutting off tree branches and stuff with a katana you bought at an anime convention, do not do it! I don’t want to have to make a fail post for you too.

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How careless was that guy in the first video?! Either he was a an amateur swordsman or he had one two many tokes before the demo. Whatever the case- how embarrassing! Doesn't do much for the credibility!

By the way dude, the last video isn't showing for some reason.

Urban_Samurai wrote on July 7, 2009 - 12:39 pm | Visit Link

seriously – how does that happen!?

Dang – thanks for the heads up. Changed it to the youtube version, let me know if that fixed it.

Matt__A wrote on July 7, 2009 - 12:57 pm | Visit Link

Working now.

An old sensei of mine used to do that with a melon in demonstrations. He was a lot more proficient at it than that guy though, it has to be said. He certainly didn't cut his volunteers!

Urban_Samurai wrote on July 7, 2009 - 1:13 pm | Visit Link

I have been hit by a flying sword in training. I was OK. Assuming risk is one thing. But, carelessness does not belong with weapons training of any kind.

Bob wrote on July 7, 2009 - 1:33 pm | Visit Link

totally true bob! I hope this post makes that point in a roundabout fashion.

Matt__A wrote on July 7, 2009 - 1:42 pm | Visit Link

Anime convention?! I resent that remark!

I get my swords at one of three area flea markets in Hillsborough County. (LOL!)

I have an instructor who was almost killed by a spear 30 years ago. Some instructor didn't like a referee's call at a tournament. A riot broke out. While my instructors were leaving, one of them narrowly avoided being stuck with a spear that someone randomly hurled in the gymnasium where the tournament was held.

By the way – is it just me or are there way too many 9th dans out there?

Sean C. Ledig wrote on July 7, 2009 - 7:10 pm | Visit Link

haha – sorry sean. I definitely stepped over the line on that one, i'll try to reel myself back in.

Also yes you are correct, there is an astounding amount of 9th/10th dans out there. it's interesting.

Matt__A wrote on July 7, 2009 - 9:08 pm | Visit Link

I think some sick amusement is warranted.

On a related topic, I use old tires for weapons training. Striking tires with kali sticks, staves or wooden swords and knives helps prepare a student for actually using his weapon in combat. Doing forms is important, but you also need to know what it's like to actually make contact with your weapon.

Believe me, if you're not used to it, you're going to be very sore and very tired (no pun intended) after some tire training.

I bring it up because when I meet some kid who thinks he's hot shit with a nunchaku because he can twirl like Bruce Lee, I'll invite him to take a swing at a tire. It's funny as hell to watch the nunchaku come flying out of the guy's hand because he's not used to actually striking anything with it.

Just make sure you're standing a good distance away so you don't get hit when they go flying.

Sean C. Ledig wrote on July 8, 2009 - 5:59 am | Visit Link

Wow, I often use a typical heavy back to use my weapons on, but thats a really great idea! I hadn't thought of that before, and I don't have to punish my expensive heavy bag (they're like a dollar / pound it's highway robbery!) and have it wear out prematurely.

Branden wrote on July 8, 2009 - 7:46 am | Visit Link

Glad you like it. Just be careful. If you're not used to it, you'll really feel the impact through the weapon, up your arm and into your body. It's a lot springier than a heavy bag. But it's also a great conditioning exercise.

Sean C. Ledig wrote on July 8, 2009 - 9:21 am | Visit Link

[...] Oops The Samurai(Hat Tip: Ikigai – Blogging the Martial Way) [...]

Weapons Training Failures: Share Your Story wrote on July 16, 2009 - 6:02 am | Visit Link

What does it do to your joints though?

Luke Crocker wrote on October 22, 2009 - 8:33 pm | Visit Link

What does it do to your joints though?

Luke Crocker wrote on October 23, 2009 - 2:33 am | Visit Link

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