Matt__A: Hooo wow. Yes I did. I asked it as a vehicle to get people thinking about what kind of weapon (if any) they...
Jackthestripper: Somewhat unrelated – Matt didn't you post a question asking what we would do if someone...
ShuriRyu: 1) My first thought would be O´Naihanchi, but thinking again, id´rather go with Sanchin, since it contains...
Matt__A: thanks for decloaking ariel!
Matt__A: Thanks for putting the BJJ spin on it Steve!

My Top 5 Holiday Wishes (As Granted By Martial Arts Santa)

December 15, 2008 | Author: Matthew | Filed under: Martial Arts, Recent Events, Top 5

Seasons greetings. We are a scant few days away from Christmas, and that means it’s time to get those last minute wishes into the folks in charge. As martial artists, we have only one mythological character to be concerned about – Martial Arts Santa.

Unlike his cousin Regular Santa, Martial Arts Santa isn’t concerned about your religious denomination. Instead he’s been watching your sidekicks and checking his list to see when your last promotion was.

Now, during this most joyous of seasons, I ask MASanta to grant me some holiday wishes.

Wish #1: Make the New Karate Kid Disappear

I’m sure many of you are aware, but there is a new Karate Kid in the works. If MASanta has the ability to visit every house in the world in a single night, certainly he can make one upcoming movie disappear.

One of the goals of the holidays is to promote peace on Earth, right? Well what better way than to avoid the rage and angst of martial artists all over the planet that grew up with the original Karate Kid series? This one seems like a no brainer.

Wish #2: Bring Bruce Lee and Musashi Back to Life and Make Them Fight

Man, what an epic showdown that would be! They’d be kinda like zombies, so we could pit them against each other in a variety of ways.

First, I’d have them go at it open-hand. No tricks. No weapons.

Second, I’d let them pick a weapon of choice. I imagine Bruce Lee would use the nunchaku while Musashi would use a katana.

Third, I would toss them both Lirpa and let things go down just like this:

Wish #3: Settle Once and For All Those Mandatory Martial Arts Questions

Every martial arts blog and forum seems to inevitably run into the same couple of questions. Things like:

1. What’s the best style?

2. Does chi exist?

3. Do no-touch knockouts exist?

4. How many fights end on the ground?

5. Is MMA a real martial art?

6. etc. etc.

My request to MASanta would be to make a list and just answer these questions definitively. If anybody questions him, MASanta would then have the authority to use his secret holiday-figurehead style to wipe out the offending parties.

I’ve never pondered what it would be like getting stabbed by a sharpened candy cane…and I don’t think I want to find out any time soon.

Wish #4: Bring me an official Red Ryder carbine-action 200-shot range model air rifle (BB Gun)

with a compass in the stock, and this thing which tells time.

Wish #5: Grant Me Ten More Wishes

What? MASanta isn’t a genie? FINE. Then I guess i’ll wish for a quick recovery for all of our martial arts brethren who are currently dealing with injury. Also, continued success to all of my readers who have been generous enough to stop by from time to time!

So what’s your wish? Get it into MASanta before it’s too late!

Share This (Good Karma Guaranteed):

This entry was posted on Monday, December 15th, 2008 and is filed under Martial Arts, Recent Events, Top 5. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

Steven Smith

I wish I had better class attendance during Holidays. Family is no excuse to miss training!

Chris | Martial Development

Musashi would promise to fight empty-handed, then pull out a hidden knife at the critical moment.

Matthew

MAM - haha, those are some excellent names. Make sure you get royalties if MASanta decides to use that.

Bob - True enough, add it to the list.

Foxy - It certainly would be a more peaceful world for me. Let's hope your wish gets granted.

Foxy Citrus

I would like to ask MASanta for peace on earth. Which, by the way, will be brought upon the world if I get a job I love. True story. Ask Mr. Ikigai here how hateful I am when I am not happy.

Thanks MA Santa!

Bob Patterson

Are we *sure* that Martial Arts Santa exists?

;-)

Lets settle that one, too.

~BCP

Martial Arts Mom

What would Santa's book be titled? "Crouching Reindeer, Hidden Elf"...Or the "The Tao of Mistletoe Martial Arts"...oh, we could just go on and on...

Matthew

MASanta:

Please tell too-tall-jones over there to spell his name correctly.

Signed,
Matt

Branden

MASanta:

Please get rid of that stupid kid in class who wears a black gi and thinks he runs the joint.

Signed
Branden

Matthew

Marguerite and Rick - The classic mother bbgun block!

BBM - I'm sure you'll hit that landmark, if not before. I think this surgery is really going to speed things up.

Elias - Secret style. No one knows yet (until he writes a book about it or makes a dvd).

MAM - Excellent list, and only slightly more realistic than my requests ;-)

Martial Arts Mom

Martial Arts Mom's personal wishes from M.A. Santa:
-a comfortable gi (a little bit of stretch? Just a little?)
-my knees and feet to stop hurting (or to get younger which would solve this also plus the added bonus of less wrinkles!)
-more time to practice martial arts

Elias

What style does MA Santa know?

=D

This is awesome

Black Belt Mama

What a great wish list! I'm especially liking number five. I'm shooting for a birthday return, February 7th, one month post surgery.

Rick Matz

About #4 - you'll put your eye out!

MargueriteNico

Hopefully MASanta is reading your blog tonight!!

About #4...you'll put your eye out, kid!

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